Sunday, May 19, 2013

My Essentials Root Beer

You guys have to be getting tired of my incessant apologizing for bringing you terrible reviews of terrible root beers, and of the fact that i keep using my recent move as an excuse, but seriously people... i've been super busy with settling in to a new job and trying to buy a house. I REALLY AM SORRY for reviewing yet another generic crappy root beer, even when i have plenty of unique bottled root beers in my fridge still. But it's just easier this way for now. Besides, most of you stopped reading these a long time ago. I think i'm just doing this for me now. So anyway, this is a root beer i found in a small town south of where i live called Belleview. There is a grocery store in Belleview that i've never seen anywhere else called SweetBay. Through my limited research (zero is a limit), i surmised that My Essentials Root Beer is the generic brand that SweetBay carries. I believe it's also carried by another grocery store i've never heard of called Hanaford's. When tried to google My Essentials Root Beer, i found this to be the most relevant site that wasn't in Russian. I don't know where Hanaford's are, and frankly i don't care. I just want to get this root beer in the books cuz i could care less about it. The only other info i care to report on this one is that it's bottled in North Carolina.

I could have elected to go for cans with this root beer, but i did the 2 liter for reasons i explained in my Publix Root Beer review. Look there if you care for a break down. If you don't, it wont break my heart. The label lacks everything a good label should. It screams generic, and i'm tired of explaining what that means. Just trust me on this one.

I'll get right to it. I hate this stuff. It's not good. It tastes like a diet soda. All i can taste is the weird aftertaste that seems like it's sweetened with aspartame, even though it's sweetened with HFCS. The carbonation is decent, and that's about all i can say thats good about it. The faint root beer flavor is quickly lost in the unpleasant aftertaste. Any redeeming qualities this root beer may have are lost on me. I give My Essentials credit for the fact that i didn't want to murder myself after drinking it, but it's not much better than some of the worst ones out there.

My official review is that My Essentials Root Beer gets 3 (three) IBCs. Consider that rating to be VERY generous on my part. You really don't deserve a 3, but a rating of 2 gives you a place with some of the more infamous root beers i've tried, and i don't think you're worth remembering at all.