Three Dachshunds Old Fashioned Root Beer

I got this from the Root Beer Store and it's one of my recent acquisitions. The title of this post is "Three Dachshunds yada yada", but the way it is written on the label (sorry to jump ahead a little) is "III Dachshunds blah blah blah". And to add even more variety, the website for this root beer is 3dachshundsbeer.com. So… i am gonna probably just call it Three Dachshunds, or simply Dachshunds, to both save time and appease my laziness. Just in case you're trying to search for it though, it might require the III (Roman numerals for those of you not in the know) to find it. It is so named because the founders of this brewery happen to own three dogs of the breed dachshund, or more commonly known as wiener dogs. The brewery is located in Milwaukee, WI and has been around since 2003. The owners really love their little wiener dogs and claim them as the sole inspiration of the brewery and beers they create there. This company seems primarily focused on brewing beer, but has managed to squeak out a root beer for people like me. How nice of them.

Now, more about the label. First, it's wrapped around a 12 oz. brown glass bottle and it's very well done. It features one of the III famous wiener dogs in front of a barrel laid on it's side and the proud logo stamped into the wood of the barrel lid. There is a little bit of the history of the brewery on the label, but most i read on the website. And they make a point to be one of those root beers that very proudly displays the fact that they brew this with pure cane sugar. Like i said though, it's a very well done label. Tasteful, not too showy, not too cheap, and captures what these root beer drinkers/brewers are most passionate about. Seems like dogs are the inspiration for a lot of beer and root beer companies. Wonder why that is. Is there a correlation between alcoholism and animal lovers? Anyone who wants to do a doctoral thesis on this, i give you my permission. Just report back on the results. That's all i ask.

You know what… this stuff is actually pretty good. Good solid root beer flavor. Good carbonation. Good finish, though after a while it does leave a bit of a bad taste in your mouth. I won't hold that against them too much though. And the cane sugar gives it a nice sweetness that is enjoyable overall. That being said, i don't find much about it that really sets it apart. It's definitely not bad, but it's also not terrific. It just kind of is. Like Skymall. It's just there. Sure, i'll leaf through it on a plane, but there is no way i am paying those inflated prices for what essentially amounts to being ridiculous junk. I mean come on, a torso toner? Give me a break. No one is buying that. However… if someone offered me that crap for free, i'd have a swanky new set of pajamas, i'll tell you that right now.

My official review of Dachshunds Root Beer is 6 (six) IBCs. Like the lovable little wiener dog on the label, i hold no ill feelings for it, but i also don't have any overwhelming affection for it. Personally, i'm not really a dog lover. I guess i would put it more correctly as i am not a pet person. I have had pets as a kid, but don't have or want any now. My wife is the same way, and my son is too young and stupid to know any different at this point. But i'm not afraid to disappoint him when he asks for a puppy. It's just not gonna happen. What i would give him though is a nice cold refreshing Dachshunds Root Beer as a compromise. Only cuz i'm a good dad though.

Sudz Root Beer

There is a little grocery store here in Ocala, FL (and i assume other places) called Aldi. Someone told me they are either affiliated with or have adopted the IKEA model and formatted it to a grocery store, but everything i read online says it is owned by the same corporation that owns Trader Joe's. I can see an IKEA influence in the way the store is laid out though. There is a specific path you have to follow as you enter the store and wind through the aisles toward the exit. It's not as bad as IKEA, forcing you to walk through the entire store before you can get out, but there is a distinct entrance and exit strategy that they use. They carry a lot of unknown brand names at significantly lower prices than even Walmart in most cases.  But people around here kinda rave about how fresh and novel their approach is. I mean… it's ok. But i don't really get it. I buy chips there cuz they are super cheap and pretty decent, but i don't shop there for much else. When i told

people i had never heard of Aldi before moving here, the one thing people wouldn't stop talking about was how amazing it was that they charge to "rent" the grocery carts. They are all locked together until you slide a quarter in this little mechanism that releases the cart. Then once you return the cart, you get your quarter back. Frankly, i find it a little cumbersome and never even bother getting a cart, but whatever. They also charge you for plastic grocery bags to take your food home in. Something like 10 cents a bag or something. Again, i don't usually bother, but i guess thats good if you're one of those people who is all "save the planet" and bring your own grocery bags with you. Whatever. Anyway, this is less a review of Aldi than it is of a particular root beer they carry called Sudz Root Beer. It's brewed by Summit (i think, but don't really care) and distributed by Aldi exclusively. Essentially it's just another generic root beer. 

I got 12 pack of cans of this stuff for something like $2.50 (Aldi has really cheap prices). I didn't even see the option to get this in a 2 liter bottle in the Aldi i went to. If i had, i would probably have gotten that. The label is well done, but is typical of a generic root beer. The color scheme and picture of the mug are a dead give away that this thing is just another store brand. So… i don't really know what else i can say about it. 

I really don't mind this stuff. It's a basic root beer flavor, but it has decent carbonation and drinks really easily. Nothing really sets it apart from other root beers, but its a good generic. Like the label though, i don't have much else to say about the taste. It's sweetened with high fructose corn syrup, so there is a little more info for you if that sways your decision at all. I will say i used it for a root beer float and it did quite well. And my two year old loves it. He calls it a "spicy drink". That has nothing to do with root beer though. He calls every soda that. And he's not very discriminatory, he loves all spicy drinks.

My official review is that Sudz Root Beer gets 6 (six) IBCs. It's pretty good stuff at a very reasonable price. I could see myself getting this again. Not sure if i'd go out of my way for it, but i liked it well enough. It's on the higher end of the generic spectrum, that's for sure. Check it out if you're near an Aldi. And don't forget to bring a quarter. 

Cooper's Cave Root Beer

I think this is the last one i have left from before this new order i just received. I believe i got it from the Root Beer Store, which it's probably safe to say most of my root beers will be coming from for the next little while. Cooper's Cave Root Beer is from Glens Falls, NY. The Cooper's Cave pub makes a variety of food and drinks, including ice cream/ice cream cakes, beer and soda, and a full menu of pub food. Although they call themselves a pub and focus on making English style ales and brews, the food seems mostly American. The website doesn't have a lot of info about how long they have been in operation or any back story about the owner. I don't have a lot to go on other than what i have already mentioned. So i think i'll just leave it at that.

The label on the 12 oz brown glass bottle is fairly simple, eye catching and original. The main portrait portrayed is that of a sketched dog. I'm not a dog person, so i don't know what breed that is. It just looks slobbery. I'm impressed with the sketch though. It's one of those ones that looks simple enough for anyone to do, but probably difficult to reproduce if you're an untrained illustrator. The color scheme of red, white and blue is classy without being patriotic or overly British or American. I think they have been in business a while because the current logo on the website looks nothing like the label. Not sure if the label is specific to the root beer or if it comes on all their sodas or ales. But overall, even though a dog has nothing really to do with root beer, i think it's a nice label. I was wondering if the dog's name was Cooper and why he owned a cave, but the website was silent about those matters. I guess it will have to remain a mystery. And if you know, keep it to yourself. It maintains the atmosphere of intrigue, and besides, no one like a know-it-all.

The taste is a bit hard to nail down. I will just get it right out front by saying it's not a great root beer, and really it's only average at best. The taste is very fleeting and has a molasses undertone that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The root beer flavor is extremely subtle and overall i think the flavor lacks the sweetness needed to balance out the total experience. It's not a very memorable root beer. Not one i will likely revisit. But for all that being said, i didn't hate this root beer. It was just kinda… meh.

My official review is that Cooper's Cave Root Beer gets 5 (five) IBCs. It's a reasonably fine root beer. Truth be told, i'm a bit of an Anglophile, and the ties this pub claims to have to Britain and English style  brewing made me have high hopes for this root beer. Unfortunately, it just doesn't stack up to some of the greats. Maybe if you're in Glens Falls, NY you should stop by the pub for some food. You might find that the root beer compliments the food, or vice versa. But for me, it didn't really do anything special.

Capone's Family Secret Root Beer

I just finished filing my taxes for the year and decided to treat myself to a root beer from the fridge. I've had this one for a while, probably at least a year or more. It came from the Root Beer Store, an online soda vendor i sometimes use to procure new root beers. Capone's Family Secret Root Beer is based on the premise that legendary 1920's mobster Al Capone used to keep his warehouses stocked with root beer instead of liquor when the feds would do raids during Prohibition. The company now produces and distributes several flavors of soda in Chicago, IL. The website says that this family recipe is now available after 80+ years, so that makes me think this stuff is fairly new to the market and has not been in production for more than 10 years or so. The validity of this story seems questionable to me. I get the feeling this is just an angle to sell sodas. From what i know, Capone was a hard one to pin down even with his involvement with several illegal activities, including bootlegging. The government tried several times to arrest him but had no charges with which to indict him. He was finally arrested and sentenced to prison in Alcatraz for tax evasion, and no it's not a coincidence that i chose to review this root beer after finishing preparing my taxes. Let's just say, i plan to stay on this side of Alcatraz's walls.

This root beer comes in a 12 oz. brown glass bottle to obscure your view from the shady dealing going on within. The label lacks any real vibrant color, but is creative in it's own right. There is a picture of a truck hauling root beer barrels over the backdrop of a root beer cap. There is a city skyline in the background with the Sear's Tower, distinctly Chicago since this is where Capone's mob operated. I've been to Chicago before a couple times and was impressed with it. Very clean city surprisingly. Not sure if i've said that before on this blog. And if i have, well… guess what. You just heard me say it again. Don't like it? Go read someone else's root beer blog, honey.

The good news is it's low in sodium. The bad new is, it's not very good. If they were trying to convince the feds that this stuff isn't alcohol, they didn't do a very good job because it tastes like a sweet beer. I don't know if it's carbonated with yeast, but it reminds me of those kinds of root beer that are fermented enough to produce carbonation but not alcohol. I will say it's easily one of the loudest root beers i've had. All the chemical reactions happening inside it are only exacerbated by opening the bottle. The root beers i would most closely relate it to would probably be Bundaburg or Gale's, both of which i really didn't care for. Gale's wasn't terrible, but i didn't really like it either. And Bundaburg WAS terrible. Those Australians really missed the boat on that one. I really don't know how else to describe this root beer. It has a sweet taste to it, but the whole flavor lasts so short a time it's hard to nail it down. The overwhelming taste though is the beer-like yeast flavor. All i can really say is that it's not very satisfying.

My official review is that Capone's Family Secret Root Beer gets 3 (three) IBCs. I was really looking forward to a nice delicious root beer. It's a shame, because this definitely did not hit the spot. Maybe Capone should have taken that secret to the grave with him cuz it doesn't belong in the root beer world.

Triple AAA Root Beer

So this root beer definitely comes from the Root Beer Store, and i have a little bit to say about that. After my last post and my realization that i was quite low on root beers to review, i decided to place an order for some new ones from the Root Beer Store. I gotta say that i'm not very satisfied with my order. First off, the root beer store is located in Washington state and i currently live in Florida, so the shipping alone was more than my order. Second, you have to order in quantities divisible by 6. Luckily, i found 11 new root beers on their site that i wanted so that meant i only had to order 1 repeat. So for an order of 12 root beers, the shipping nearly doubled the price of my total order. I realize that i am going to have to face that if i want to get access to new root beers and this is my only method of getting them, so the fact that shipping is expensive isn't really the issue. And the fact that you have to order in quantities divisible by 6 doesn't really bother me either unless the following scenario happens (which it did). I got a call the next day from someone at the Root Beer Store telling me that 3 of the root beers i ordered were out of stock. So now i am doubling up on 4 root beers unless i want to forgo getting 2 new ones and reduce my order to 6 root beers. It was a little frustrating to say the least. I know it's a petty thing to be upset about, but it's not cheap doing these mail orders, so if they don't have the root beer available i'd like to know before i commit to buying a large order like this. And as it turns out, one of the ones i had ordered was this one because i didn't realize i had it in my fridge. So i asked to sub that one out too, meaning my order of 11 new root beers was actually reduced to 7. Pretty bummed out about it. But if i was going to pay good money for mail order root beers, i wanted to make sure i got some quality stuff that i don't have direct access to here, so i had them add some Iron Horse, Goose Island, Saranac, and Hank's to my order. For those of you not hip to the root beer pecking order yet, these ones are some heavy hitters. Never disappointing. Anyway, i've ranted enough about my unpleasant experience with the RBS. Lesson learned. I will probably check out Soda Emporium first next time. No minimum order or quantity requirements there, but the shipping is still what gets you for the most part.

So let's talk about Triple AAA Root Beer. This one has been hiding in my fridge for quite some time, which is why i completely forgot about it and accidentally ordered it again this time. This root beer comes from Oklahoma City, OK and was first produced back in 1937, making it one of the oldest brands i've reviewed. The website mentions that the founders based their brand off the Texas brand Triple XXX (which i have also reviewed, but don't really remember since it was quite a while ago).

This comes in a 12 oz. brown glass bottle like any self respecting root beer would. You will see that the label has an older look to it, as i believe this is the original design used when the company first started. However, there are a few discrepancies with the label, namely that it says clearly at the top that this soda is sweetened with pure cane sugar while the ingredients list shows an absence of cane sugar in favor of high fructose corn syrup. This is likely due to the soda being out of production starting in 1974 and being revamped in 2010 (apparently with an altered recipe). There is also a website for Bricktown Candy on the label, which is the company who revitalized the brand and put it back into production as well as currently distributes it. Regardless, i like the label. It's simple, but the nostalgia it brings is a big plus.

The taste is up for debate though. I've had a rash of root beers lately that really just don't taste like root beer. This one would probably fall into that category. When i cracked it open (not a twist-off cap btw), i noticed a very sweet aroma. It's a fairly fragrant root beer, if you can call it that, but it doesn't have the typical redolence you would expect to accompany a root beer.

It smells more like candy than anything, and the taste matches. It's very sweet despite lacking pure cane sugar and has a taste reminiscent of circus peanuts or chicks and rabbits easter candy (which my wife insists taste different from each other, but they are the same thing and are both disgusting and shameful). Those things that dissolve in your mouth and make you pray for death have no place in a root beer. My wife agrees, and she actually LIKES those candies. That all being said, this isn't a terrible root beer. Sure, it doesn't taste like root beer, but it also doesn't taste like genocide. I can finish a bottle without wanting to smash said bottle and impale myself with the broken base afterward.

My official review is that Triple AAA gets 4 (four) IBCs. It's better than the last root beer i reviewed, but that was a pretty small mountain to scale. I think i've said enough about this root beer, so i'll just end with a story from when i was in high school and dated a girl who… let's just say "lacked virtue". Anyway, it was a short lived relationship and when it ended my friends and i stuck circus peanuts on the outside of her bedroom window. Mostly because they lend themselves to a certain shape. Was it a stupid thing? Of course, as were most things i did in high school. But i still don't regret it.

Ben's Old Fashioned Root Beer

Happy New Year to all! I only have a few root beers left in my fridge, and while i don't currently put them out at a very fast rate, it might be time for me to reorder again soon. Today's root beer is Ben's Old Fashioned Root Beer from Ben's Kosher Deli. This is one of the root beers i got from… you know what? I don't even know where i got this one. I can't find it on either The Root Beer Store or Soda Emporium sites, so i can't verify i got it from either of those places. And it comes from Merrick, NY, a place where i have never been and have not been near in several years. So i really am at a loss this time. Sorry to whoever gave this to me that i cannot give you proper credit. But i do appreciate it. The website isn't super helpful on info about Ben's, but it's a New York kosher deli with several locations and a 4 out of 5 star rating on Yelp!. I don't trust Yelp! anymore by the way. Most of the time the reviews are written by the owners and/or close friends or persons with a vested interest. Yelp! hasn't done me much good, especially not here in Ocala, FL. The local flavor here is pretty dismal.

This one comes in a clear glass bottle. It's 12 oz. to be sure. The label is pasted on a little crooked like the machine was misaligned or the guy doing it manually doesn't get paid enough. It's one of the more simple designs i've seen. Not a lot of imagination or flashiness to it. I'm thoroughly unimpressed. Really don't know what else to say about it. Way to disappoint the customer right out of the gate Ben.

I can't say much for the taste either. Really, i can't say anything about the taste. It honestly doesn't taste like anything. It's so watered down that you barely get a sense that you're drinking root beer at all, let alone a soda of any variety. It's just so unnoticeable that i don't really even know what to say about it. I guess it tastes vaguely like sugar, even though it's sweetened with HFCS, but even that flavor is so fleeting and shallow that i can't really even call this a root beer. I'd call it… sugar. In water. ("Eggar… your skin is hanging off your bones…"). For reals though, i work with a guy who looks just like that guy right now. It's pretty exhilarating/unsettling.

My official review is that Ben's Old Fashioned Root Beer gets 3 (three) IBCs. It's not cutting it in the root beer world, and i am not even sure it can measure up as a soda. I've had root beers more offensive than this, but being offensive isn't Ben's problem. It's being distinguishable. I mean, kudos for doing the kosher thing and all. But even if that's your thing, i can't really recommend this stuff. It just doesn't do anyone any good.

Round Barn Root Beer

We are getting ready to go back to Arizona for the holidays and i know that i won't review a root beer there (most likely), so i wanted to get at least one in the books for this month while i had time. The truth is i am running low on my reserves in my fridge, but i know of a lot more root beers out there right now that i need to get my hands on to review. But anyway, i will keep this one brief as well. You're all probably rather weary of hearing my endless babbling anyway. Round Barn Root Beer is branded by Pops Restaurant on historic Route 66 in Arcadia, OK. I guess the round barn is an iconic/historic landmark there. I'm not really interested in that myself as several times on this blog i have already displayed my lack of enthusiasm for anything Route 66 related. But i get that others are happy about it and long for the days of yesteryear, when the threat of nuclear annihilation was almost certain and were driven by irrational fears like the Red Scare and desegregation. Bunch of dummies if you ask me.

This root beer came in the traditional 12 oz. brown glass bottle and features a picture on the label of the titular round barn that is said to be so iconic to the area. It's a nice label, colorful and vivid. One of the better one's i've seen. I think the restaurant itself has a nicer iconic landmark though. Pictures i've seen remind me a little of a place in Gilbert, AZ called Joe's Farm Grill (a great place to eat). So the fact that they went with a barn for the name of the root beer and picture on the label seems as misguided as those people wandering Route 66 in search of a past era that really doesn't seem all that great to me. Regardless though, i think they did a fine job with the label. 

And as far as the root beer is concerned, i think they did a pretty bang up job with that as well. To be honest, i wasn't expecting much from this one. I've kind of been on a run of mediocre and bad root beers, so i figured this one would be par for the course. But i am afraid that streak as been broken, because we've got ourselves a pretty decent root beer here folks. The first thing i noticed about it after opening it was the strong wintergreen aroma (an automatic plus for me). It has a nice carmel undertone with a moderate wintergreen base and a creamy finish. I like it quite a bit. It's not super original or ground breaking, but it hit a lot of the things i like best in a root beer. It's also sweetened with high fructose corn syrup and has decent carbonation. Really the only thing bad i can say about it is that it left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth at the very end. Overall very enjoyable though. 

My official review is that Round Barn Root Beer gets 7 (seven) IBCs. It's a good root beer that kinda crept up on me from out of nowhere. I really wasn't expecting it from this one so it was a nice surprise. I have driven through Oklahoma City before and don't know that i will ever afford myself that opportunity again, but if i find myself out that direction i wouldn't mind checking out Pops and grabbing another one of these. Seems like it could be a pretty cool place.