Berghoff Root Beer

This root beer has been around a while. Berghoff is also a restaurant that bottles and sells its root beer commercially. The Berghoff restaurant is located in Chicago, IL and has been making root beer since 1898. The website shows a picture of the restaurant and it looks like a pretty swingin' joint. I have been through Chicago once as well (on the same road trip that took me through St. Louis) and spent an afternoon there, but didn't get a chance to look for Berghoff's. Probably because i didn't even know it existed. But anyway, it was started by a German immigrant and has a rich history (which you can read about on the site if you so choose to). The restaurant looks pretty cool. Reminds me of Cheers in Boston, which in case you didn't know, the inside of Cheers looks nothing like the TV set which was filmed in Los Angeles.

The bottle is your standard 12 oz.er and has a very ornate label. It looks like an actual beer bottle label. This isn't much of a shock at all considering Berghoff originally made beer. But it has lots of fancy looking font, gold colors, and it's eye catching for sure. I think it probably compliments the history of the company, and i should know since i'm a huge history buff. Man... i'm so smart.

Anyway, moving on to taste. It's a good root beer. I liked it and it has the good root beer flavor, but it kind of puzzles me. It has another element to it that for the life of me i just cannot identify. There is just something about it that i can't place. It's not bad by any means, but it bugs me that a professional of the highest caliber like myself cannot figure out exactly what this root beer tastes like. I will say this though, the extra whatever doesn't take away from the flavor, but it doesn't really add to it either. It's just kinda there. So all in all, Berghoff is just another regular root beer.

My official review is that Berghoff gets 5 (five) IBCs. I didn't mind it at all, but it kind of your standard middle of the road kind of root beer. I am not sure how widely distributed this root beer is either, but i wouldn't pick one up unless you wanted to help me figure out what i'm tasting. But to be completely honest, i'm the professional here and you're not. What do you know about root beer? Nothing. So i probably wouldn't listen to you anyway.

Thanks for being a loyal reader though...

Fitz's Root Beer

Here is another root beer i hadn't heard of before i became a world renowned professional root beer reviewer. Fitz's Root Beer has been brewed and bottled in St. Louis, MO since 1947. That's where Big Jeff was born, so that's kinda neat. The website says that Fitz's is also a drive-in style restaurant that is still in operation today and sells its root beer commercially. I drove through St. Louis one time with my wife (then girlfriend) and a few other friends on our way out to beautiful Buffalo, NY. I doubt i will ever make that drive again, but i decide to, i might make a detour to go and visit Fitz's drive-in to see if it's any good. Check out this video of of a recent news piece done about Fitz's restaurant. The bottling plant is located right in the restaurant, and they cater to both kids and adults. Sounds like a cool place to me.

It's a 12 oz bottle, but it has a little different shape to it. It's almost like the short, stout bottles of Iron Horse and Thomas Kemper, but it's tall instead of short. Either way, i like it. I also dig the label design. It's colorful and modern while maintaining a retro look. It's also very simple, but it caught my eye when i was picking out root beers at the Pop Shop. There isn't a lot to it, but something about it sticks out to me. You can disagree with me and say it doesn't to you, but we all know you're lying, don't we readers? (i like to get my readers involved. keeps the morale high.)

To top it all off, Fitz's is a good tasting root beer. It's not really amazingly different at all, but it has that good mellow wintergreen flavor followed with a smooth vanilla finish. It's well carbonated and easy to drink. Sip it or chug it, this stuff is pretty ok.

My official review is that Fitz's gets 7 (seven) IBCs. It's not necessarily an original flavor, but i enjoyed it none the less. Plus, the news piece makes the restaurant look like it's a pretty cool place to visit. I'm not sure how widely distributed this stuff is, but i think it's worth picking up again, and if you get the chance you should try it out too.

Rat Bastard Root Beer

This root beer is a jerk that almost demands that you drink it. Rat Bastard is one of those terms you hear on NYC cop dramas on TV or in the movies. Honestly, being from Arizona, i don't know the true implication of calling someone that, except that you mean to tell them they are a big meany and you don't like them. I can't find where Rat Bastard is bottled or how long it has been around. I would wager some where either in or near New Jersey or NYC. Again, on the bottle i am directed to visit this site, but i find it incredibly unhelpful. I am not sure what i am supposed to be looking at/for. So it's a mystery. How about i just make something up and you believe me. Ok? Here goes. Rat Bastard is bottled in Kentucky. It has been around since March.

Ok, but really, here is what i do know about Rat Bastard; it's very arbitrarily aggressive. The bottle is your typical 12 oz. dark brown glass bottle. The label has multiple funky colors and has a sloppy, hand written feel to it. It has several things written on the label that just come off like this root beer is really mad at you. I get the feeling like, "What are you lookin' at?! Just drink me, you queer!" On top of the cap, it says an insulting word not suitable for our younger readers, and under the cap it just says, "Stop putting Canadian quarters in the parking meter!" I imagine other caps have different complaints listed under them. Hey, RB... why so angry? Seriously, is the world that mean to you? Come on, lighten up. Maybe if you weren't $2 a bottle (yup, it's a pricey one) people would like you more and be more friendly to you. And to be honest, i wouldn't have even bought you if i weren't reviewing root beers. You jerk. You big bully meany jerk.

As far as taste goes, Rat Bastard isn't bad, but it's nothing new. Again, i immediately thought of Jack Black's Dead Red Root Beer. They have the same distributor and refer to the same useless website (skeleteens.com), so i imagine they come from basically the same place. It's different in that it's not nearly as strong of a nutmeg flavor as JBDR. I actually almost appreciated it more because it wasn't so overpowering. But it also lacked a lot of carbonation and it was basically flat. So that was a downer. All in all it was kind of a let down cuz it felt like i had already tried this one.

My official review is that Rat Bastard gets 5 (five) IBCs. It's not a terrible soda, but it's nothing new. I have tasted this already, and the fact that it has so little carbonation turns me off. And it doesn't help that it is just so aggressive. At least to for me it doesn't. I just don't care to be bullied around by my root beer. I get enough of that from my wife. And the final blow came when i had to pay $2 for a regular bottle of it. I just didn't think it was worth it. So i would say skip this one and get a Dad's or a JBDR instead if you want a similar taste.

Stewart's Root Beer

This one shouldn't be new to anyone. It's a real classic and can be found all over the place. Stewart's has been around since 1924. It was actually started by Frank Stewart, a school teacher looking to supplement his income. The company only recently began bottling and selling root beer out of Rye Brook, NY. Up until 1990, you had to go to a Steward's root beer stand or drive-in, and up until 1992, the only flavor they sold was root beer. Now it can be found in grocery stores and gas stations all over the country and they have several flavors to choose from and continue to produce more. I would be surprised if people haven't at least seen Stewart's around. I have actually had Stewart's several times before, though i haven't had to review it until now.

The bottle is a shorter, sorta stout 12 oz.er, though i am not as drawn to this one as i am to the Iron Horse or Thomas Kemper designs. It has the label printed on a clear sticker in just a few colors (orange, white, and brown) and is pretty simple. It's not really flashy, but it doesn't really need to be. I think the name is recognized enough that people know what they are getting into.

It has that classic root beer taste with a nice, rich carmel finish. I was eating chips before i drank it, and it almost tasted like carmel popcorn to me from the salt. But my wife assured me it was just a carmel flavor, and not a carmel popcorn flavor. In fact, she insisted it tasted like carmel syrup that you would put on ice cream. I promptly raised the back of my hand to her, ready to strike, and she remembered her place.

My official review is that Stewart's gets 7 (seven) IBCs. I like this root beer a lot. It's not an IBC, but it's a good substitute for one if you can't find one. The good, solid root beer flavor is well complimented by the carmel after taste. This also reminds me of Iron Horse, which i found quite delicious. But i still think Iron Horse is better. Anyway, the great thing about Stewart's (besides the fact that it's good) is that you can find it all over the place, so it's readily available. Grab one where ever you are, cuz it should be easy to find.

And if i may take a minute to be serious, i love my wife and i never hit her. Domestic violence is nothing to make fun of or joke about. Except for this. Makes me laugh every time.

Faygo Root Beer

Here is one i had never heard of before doing my reviews. Faygo was started in 1907 in Detroit, MI by Russian brothers who were originally bakers. Faygo offers a variety of different flavors of soda. The website give a detailed history of their beginnings and successes. One of the mentions on the website is that their logo was updated, which makes me think this bottle i have pictured is the old logo. The logo on the website looks a little more modern. One thing i thought particularly interesting about this one is that you can buy a copy of one of their old 1970's TV commercials singing a memorable song from your childhood (if you're old enough). Oh... and you have to buy it on VHS. Hmmm... i don't think i even have a VCR any more. I guess it's supposed to be a very popular song from back then that people will want to keep in their video and music libraries. Perhaps you can get a copy of just the song... on vinyl or cassette. Seems like they might be a bit trapped back in the "glory days".

This bottle is a 12 oz clear glass bottle, and like i mentioned above, i think this might be the old logo. It's very retro, but i don't dislike it. It's kind of endearing. But it just goes to show that these guys have been around for a long time. I imagine it's fairly popular in some circles, but this is the first i have heard of it.

It's not a bad tasting drink. It definitely has that classic root beer taste, but on top of that there is another flavor i am having difficulty pinpointing. It reminds me of a candy from my childhood, and i want to say circus peanuts, but i am sure that's not right. I just can't exactly figure out what i am tasting. But it's good. Not amazing, but good. I liked the rich, classic root beer flavor followed by the childhood candy flavor which i will identify for now as those crappy little marshmallow circus peanut candies that make you sick if you eat more than 6 of them. It makes for a good tasting root beer though.

My official review is that Faygo gets 6 (six) IBCs. I was teetering on giving it a 7, but it's just not that amazing. It's good, and i would drink it again, but i couldn't quite give it a 7. It's more middle of the road than extraordinary. But i would choose it over some of the other brands out there that fall into the same catergory. I say give this one a shot if you'd like.

Thomas Kemper Root Beer

This is another root beer that often gets a lot of attention and praise (at least in root beer circles). Thomas Kemper (by the way, really nice site) has only been around since 1990 and is brewed and bottled in Portland, OR. My wife loves Oregon. I myself have never been there, but i hear it's full of hippies. Yuck. Anyway, they have a line of sodas they distribute, and one of the things that they really promote is the fact that their sodas (or at least their root beer) contain pure Northwest honey. This is how they want to distinguish themselves in the root beer market. Good for them. I got no issues with promoting the fact that you use honey in your soda.

i like the short, stubby bottle they use. It's a 12 oz.er and it has an attractive label. There is a lot of info on the side about how TK started and what goes into brewing their root beer. There is a little emblem of a honey bee on the label as well as the cap, and the design is both retro and fresh, so no complaints there either.

But... i can't make it through this review with out complaining a little. Ok, a lot. My initial review was that i hated this stuff. I know they put honey in their root beer, but it was overpoweing. It's all i could taste. I had a friend in high school that wouldn't eat honey at all because he said it's like eating a bee's puke. He was dead serious about it too. I'm not really in that category. I just don't necessarily like the taste of honey, but i don't hate it either. I would say i am impartial to it. However, when my root beer tastes only like carbonated honey, i begin to have a problem with it.

I actually put off writing this review after talking to a colleague because i told him how much i disliked it. He told me he thought it had a taste very similar to Virgil's and that he thought it was good. He said he could barely even taste the honey. I told him he was clearly mental and that it tasted nothing like Virgil's and i couldn't taste anything but the honey. So he convinced me that maybe i just got a bad bottle (i've had bad bottles of different root beers before, not including Weinhard's which are all bad bottles), so i gave it another shot. It did change my mind... but just a little. I found that i could indeed taste the black licorice taste (like Virgil's), but ever so slightly at the beginning. And again, the overwhelming honey taste was a big turn off for me. It almost tasted gritty and raw, like i was drinking straight honey. So in the end, i still wasn't a huge fan of it.

My official review is that Thomas Kemper gets 4 (four) IBCs. I was originally going to give them a 3, but the second try on it convinced me to cut them a little slack (i'm not going to make a habit of it though). I will give them credit for originality with the honey. It's something i haven't had a lot of in a root beer before. So kudos for that. However, i think they could tame it down a bit. And i know there is a big following for TK out there. It probably stems from my not caring much about the honey taste though. If you're into honey (a lot), you might like this stuff. It was a bit too raw for me though. So unless that's what you're into, i would say get something different.

Jones Root Beer

This is a soda that i would wager nearly everyone has heard of. Or, i should say, of which everyone has heard (sorry grammar geeks). Jones Soda is a product of Canada and has authority to brew and bottle its sodas in Seattle, WA. Jones started out as an affiliate of another distributor and was officially established as its own company in 1996. Jones made a name for itself through its variety of classic as well as unique and "wierd" flavors, and for the variety of photographs shown on the labels of every bottle of Jones Soda. One of the appeals is that the consumers can get involved by sending in photos of... anything really. If Jones likes the picture, it will feature it on their bottles. The flavor of the soda has nothing to do with what pictures are featured. As far as i can tell, it's completely random. Jones also has different fortunes under the cap which are straight from fortune cookies. Consumers can also send in some of their favorite fortunes to see if they end up under the cap. So the interaction with the public is kind of a cool thing and draws a crowd.

Jones frequently puts out "holiday packs" of usually 4 different flavors that are related to a certain holiday. For example, with Thanksgiving fast approaching, maybe you'd like to pick up a pack with flavors like turkey, gravy, and mashed potatoes. Maybe for Christmas you want to taste a "pear tree" or a "candy cane" soda. They don't stop there though. It seems they try and out-do themselves every year (or so...) on top of that. Kinda neat that they keep trying to develop new flavors like that. I would call them the Jelly Bellys of sodas, and that's because i'm clever.

It's a 12 oz bottle, clear, and it has a resealable cap. This bottle features a color picture of what seems to be a chandelier or something. Sometimes they are color, sometimes black and white. Again, as far as i can tell, it's completely random regarding which picture ends up on which flavor or bottle. I have seen the same picture on several different flavors. This photo is #8120, and another novelty is that Jones lists on thier bottle the name of the person who sends in the photo and where they are from.

It's a good tasting root beer. It has a classic, solid root beer taste with a very good vanilla after taste. But nothing about it really makes it an amazing root beer. It's good, but it doesn't stand out that much. I mean, i like root beer as much as the next person, but when you're looking at the whole range and scope of Jones flavors (meaning, there are a lot of them), you might look over the root beer for something else that you've never even thought of in a soda before.

My official review is that Jones gets 6 (six) IBCs. I like the root beer. It's a good flavor. But i think i am just more a fan of the soda in general. They have tons of great flavors, and the pictures and interaction with the public is pretty cool. So if i had my choice of Jones sodas, i probably wouldn't reach for a root beer. Hey, you can't drink root beer all the time, right? But i would recommend it if you're looking for a good tasting root beer.